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Some things I've always wanted to change

At the moment I'm writing this, I'm really really happy with the girl that I've become. I have my insecurities, just like any other girl out there. But I think I can look at myself and be pretty proud of the person that I am becoming. There are a few things that I have ALWAYS wanted to change about myself. After I hit the "Publish" button, I'm letting them go. I am walking away and not letting them bother me anymore. I figure that there is a reason Heavenly Father blessed me with the qualities I have...even if I don't currently like them. So once I hit that publish button, I will most definitely begin to start embracing them instead.

1   I am way too nice to people who don't deserve it.
The other day, I told my mom a story of a certain individual who said they'd pay me back and didn't, but like...multiple times, and she says, "Why do you keep doing it then? You're way too nice. Just stop." Well, if you refer to #3, I suppose I just...keep doing it, and shouldn't let people take advantage of me the way they do.

2  I care way more than I should & I try more than I should.
When people let things go & move on, it's not that I cling onto things I shouldn't, it's that I care so much that I can't sleep at night sometimes. I care about people more than they even think. I think about them more than they think about me. I try really really hard for positive relationships all around, even when I need to just...stop.

3  I forgive a little too easily.
I guess this is a good thing according to the gospel of Jesus Christ, right? Ha! I just kick myself for forgiving people when they turn right around and hurt me 1,000,000 times more. But it's cool, it's cool, I'm beginning to embrace it and just get over it.

4  I tend to like people a heck of a lot more if they listen to the same music as I do.
I shouldn't judge [[about music]]. But, I do. And that won't change.

5  I am so freakin closed.
I don't let hardly anybody into my thoughts. Partly because I think a lot of people don't understand me. Partly because I have trust issues. Partly because I already know that you don't deserve it. :)

6  I am too much of a realist.
I think this bothers Mr. Schroeder sometimes. If there's an idea, or a spontaneous awesome thing, I will sometimes shut it down because I look at every single possibility and determine if it is realistic or not. I need to work on my imagination for sure.

Are there any qualities about yourself that you have always wanted to change? 
Are there any qualities that you have had to LEARN to embrace? 

8 comments

  1. Oh gosh I can relate to all of these. Maybe it comes with the name? Haha. I just finally ended a life long friendship with someone who kept stepping all over me, and I just kept forgiving and being nice, over and over again. My husband finally talked some sense into me. It's SUCH a relief.

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  2. i love this post, & i love your raw honesty on your blog. i literally connected with every word about caring too much, being too nice, letting people walk all over me, etc. being this way is connected to a lot of heartache, but in the end--i like being the nice guy/the patient friend. i think it creates a tenderness to your life that other people just don't have. it's something that i am learning to like about myself, rather than wanting to change it. (but at the same time, still learning to stand up for myself when really necessary.) i think you are great, & that picture is gorgeous!!

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    1. You are so nice -- thanks so much for your comment. I have something to learn from you....for sure! I would love to be the nice girl and the patient friend. And I am definitely working on embracing them. Thanks, Kayla.

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  3. I love this! I think I'll do a post like it!

    I just have to say I really love your blog. You are always so real, straight forward, and post what you want. I relate a lot so I think it's cool!

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  4. I love this post, Amanda! I am the same way when it comes to being too nice. I have had people owe me money and they say they'll pay me over and over and over and it just never happens. I've had to learn to just forget it and move on. One thing about myself that I've always wanted to change is that I don't stand up for myself very well. I let people walk all over me and I've always hated that about myself!

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  5. The amount of anxiety I feel over pressing the orange "publish" button, even when it's a lighthearted post. I'm like, "okay is this even funny?" So stressful. Anyway. Love you to pieces. And your blog.
    xoxo Birdie
    cleanenoughlaundry.blogspot.com

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  6. I love that you are willing to be open about the things that you want to change. Good for you for being aware of these things. And thanks for sharing :) By the way, I think you're wonderful :)

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  7. As I was reading through this I just thought that none of these things were really bad. It's other people in this world that take advantage of amazing people like you and that makes you have to hide a part of you so that you don't get hurt. I wish the world was a little different so it didn't have to be this way.

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