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Blogger Identity Crisis

I sort of feel like I'm in a rut. Just a small rut, nothing too major. Here's the thing. Throughout all of my blogging, the main purpose I wanted a blog for was to document my marriage and our journey together. Soon after we got married, it started growing in popularity. It was very exciting to me at first. I got invited to my first blogger meetup, I began emailing certain girls back and forth, and began establishing some awesome relationships, all because of blogging. Then, I got tired. At blogger meetups, sometimes I was the only person who wasn't a fashion blogger. I went to another blogger meetup and that just ended bad. But I forced myself to keep going, because I knew there were people I cared about, at least through email, that I wanted to meet. I experienced quite a few blogger meetups that were so fun! I met some awesome girls that I looked forward to seeing again by either hanging out or at another meetup. Just last week, Kelsey, Amberly, Sierra and I hung out and watched The Bachelor. I had an amazing time! 

Now, here is the struggle. I feel like I'm not on the same page with most bloggers, at least with the ones that I meet. Most of the conversations talk about growing your blog, meeting "famous bloggers", blog conferences, getting paid, sponsoring, and so much more. I'm not interested in 90% of it. I am solely interested in blogging, writing, and at times, meeting sweet readers or other bloggers I have been in contact with. I guess you could say that the rut that I am in is that I don't know what kind of blogger I want to be. I love writing. I love meeting people. However, it seems like I can't do both. I feel terrible when I go long periods of time not reading someones blog that might read mine on a daily basis. I feel bad when I am just too busy to sit down and read blogs, and I don't comment back. I feel awkward when those around me are talking about conferences or something else that I'm merely just not interested in at this particular time. I'm not a pretender and I've always been myself. I suppose I'm just trying to find my place.

Have you ever had a blogger identity crisis? I don't know where I want to go and I don't know where I want to be. I've been me and only me for very long, but I sort of feel like my interests are taking me in completely opposite directions? Do you feel bad when people comment on your blog often and you're busy with a full-time job, full-time school, and catering to your husband? I can't seem to find the balance of writing or caring more about where my blog goes. You catchin my drift? 

18 comments

  1. I feel this a lllllllll the time. I use my blog as a diary. But I know I could go big and network and bla bla bla if I wanted to but, I just don't want to. I love the blogs that are about everyday life, not, here's five ways to make your blog better! Here's what I do to get more followers! It feels not genuine to me.

    But, I'm a loner out in blog world. So my advice doesn't count haha!
    And I totally feel bad when I don't comment a lot on peoples blogs. I'm reading them! Just don't have time to comment.
    Except for now. Haha! Love you!

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  2. I've experienced that before. I'm starting to figure out that I'm not ready to throw myself into the networking-sphere of blogging because I just don't have the freedom to do so, and it is frustrating because there is so much pressure constantly..

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  3. Finding balance is really hard :P And it's hard to feel like you have to post so consistently or read every blog posts and leave meaningful comments. We were actually talking about your blog at a blog conference and how you just write to write and people appreciate that and they obviously love it! You haven't marketed yourself at all and your readership has just naturally grown! Don't have an identity crisis! You might not be like every other blogger, but you don't follow the "norm" and people notice and love it! Some people blog just for fun, some people blog to inspire others, some people blog and hope to make money out of it (but are still mostly blogging for them), some people have completely lost sight of why they started in the first place, and some people just record their life and nothing else! I've always admired you as a blogger! You're so carefree and don't seem to care about the "rules", write this many times a week, sponsor someone every month, participate in link-ups, promote your blog posts, etc. and you stick to it! I admire you as a blogger, and I love that you know how you want to write and what you want your blog to be and you stick to it, no matter what! :)
    And I love hanging out with you! We need to do it again soon! :)

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  4. totally know what you mean. i'm the exact same way. i kind of like to try new things on my blog, but i'm not into really growing my blog for the sake of money. i like making relationships and starting conversations and sharing. i definitely don't feel bad not responding all the time, life is busy and i just try to talk to people through their blog instead. life gets crazy and life can be boring, so i mean i feel like people are understanding. i decided that i want to blog to keep track of our lives and its a place for me to keep photos of our adventures.

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  5. I wanted you to know that what you are feeling is completely and totally normal! Just like in life, each individual person finds themselves driven in a different direction and it is hard when it seems like you are going in a direction that deviates with your friends or individuals who mean the most to you. Just remember why you wrote your blog all for the purpose of documenting YOUR life! Go in whatever direction you would like to go because ultimately that is what will make you happy. Personally my blog is driven by my feelings and advice that I have to try to inspire others to live a life that is free of negativity and to be the best person they can be. I know that I have a small following, however that is okay because if I can just touch one life for the better in my blog then I have accomplished great things. Your blog has a large following but that does not mean you have to write to appease your audience. Write what you want to write for the purpose of documenting the moments that you treasure most in your heart, not for others but for you! I hope this helps!

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  6. Let me start by saying, I am in the same boat as you, I meant for my blog to be about my husband and family, and all the happy things I like in life, latley i seemed to have lost my way with it. I am comparing myself to other peoples blogs too much, I don't WANT to monitize it,I dont want it to be a fashion blog. I actually stopped writing for a bit so that I could concentrate on other things and refresh my thought and writing process. I LOVE your blog because it's NOT a fashion blog. I follow enough of those. I feel at home reading your posts, I look for ideas to implement in my own marraige and I delight in seeing that im not the only one who has struggles. And besides I mean Mormon Monday....HELLO! I love reading that feature every monday. Keep doing what your doing and consider it a collective of the good times and bad times in your life, think of how much fun it would be to go back and read your blog years from now, all the good memories you put in it. (BTW there are services where you can "Publish" your blog into a book, I did that with my old blog and it came out really cool and chronicles the early years of our marraige. As far as feeling guilt about not catching up on others blogs...TOTALLY normal!! I feel like that most days, but you shouldnt feel guilty, you have a life and other things going on that deserve your full attention, if you get to reading them then you do if you dont then you don't BIG HUGS

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  7. I remember there was a time where I wanted my blog to be popular! (like yours!) For a couple months all I cared about was how to get more followers and yahda yahda yahda. I started writing about what I thought people wanted to read, instead of just writing what I wanted to write.. it TOTALLY sucked all the fun out of blogging and I started to hate it. Then my blog crashed and I lost all my follwers so I had to start over again. AND IT WAS AWESOME! I started writing for me again.. I stopped worrying about my followers (cause I had none!). All these people follow you for YOU! So don't be anything except yourself. Write what you want to write! Because there's no doubt that we'll all still follow along :) chin up sister! :)

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  8. You know what, I was actually telling someone about you at the conference I went to. We were talking about how content is more important than anything else and Amberly and started telling this girl about you and how your blog has grown so much solely because people enjoy reading what you write. I know I do!

    You don't have to be a fashion blogger, blog for money, or be any other type of blogger than just the blogger behind We & Serendipity. I love that you write just to write! Your posts always make me think and they are always genuine because they come directly from your heart and I love that about you!

    As for blogger meetups, I've never thought you seemed out of place because you didn't care about conferences or sponsorships. You belong simply because you are a writer, which when you get down to it is the very heart of blogging. I absolutely adore you and your blog. If it stays just how it is now, I will keep reading it. If you decide to change it up, I will keep reading it as well, because I love what YOU have to say. I don't really care exactly what it's about.

    I hope all of that made sense. Sorry for the long comment!

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  9. don't worry about it! just continue to be yourself...don't put any pressure on yourself to fit into a 'blogger category". just continue to write...whatever the heck you wanna write! it's YOUR blog, it's YOUR outlet. also, don't feel bad for not being obsessed with being famous in the blog world....there are more important things in life ;)

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  10. I think you've found your identity... You blog for the fun of it. I love reading blogs, that's my hobby, that's how I get away from being a wife and mother and just read interesting things (mostly because I don't have the time to read a book) like fashion, cooking, DIY, and just about people's lives in general. I write my blog so that I actually write in my journal--blogging about it is a way I can do that and communicate with family and friends. I don't think you have to blog about something specific, or make money, if you don't want to.
    Just keep doing what you're doing, blogging because you want to, not because you have to. :)

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  11. Your blog one of the few I actually read because it's real and relatable. I can't relate to all the glam and fashion blogs, it's just not me. So whatever direction you've been going, keep going:) Also, I've never even checked to see if a blogger has responded to my comment. If I want a direct answer, I will just email! So don't feel bad for not responding to people! That's my 2 cents on the matter.

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  12. I'll tell you why you should blog... because it's a wonderful way for you to keep a journal of the happenings between you & your husband. It's a place where you can look back & remember the good things as well as look at how far away the bad things seem. However, you shouldn't blog for any reason other than the fact that it makes you happy & that you want to be doing it. Something I've been trying to do recently is to focus on things that make me happy. If it doesn't make me happy, I stop doing it. If it does make me happy, I'll keep it around until it doesn't anymore... if that ever happens. If blogging is too stressful for you, & you find yourself unhappy because of the people or the atmosphere, then stop doing it. Or maybe take it out of the public's view until you're ready to let people read about you again. You don't owe anything to us, Amanda. But I want you to know that sometimes, it's your sweet & encouraging words of endearment that make me smile & go about my rough day with ease :)

    ps, we should definitely do lunch next time I'm close to you :)

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  13. I love reading your blog because it isn’t like everyone else’s blog. It’s raw and full of emotion; it has me laughing, inspired, and looking at life differently because it is 100% who you are. I like to read your blog because of the voice you create; you’re not like everyone else and that is what I absolutely love. It’s ok to not be like everyone else in this blogging world; your writing is why so many readers, including myself, enjoy your blog.

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  14. I go back and forth between wondering if I should do sponsorships or not! I go through blogger identity crisis all the time!!

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  15. I actually stop reading blogs when they have too many sponsored posts and they go to Summit and blog about their blogging events and have a lot of c/o clothing and giveaways. It seems so insincere. My least favorite blogs are His Little Lady and Crowley Party. I feel like both of them are just in it for sponsors and comment on tons of other blogs just to get followers and comments. I like reading blogs to hear about people's lives and to get insight into their world. I really enjoy your blog. I've never commented before but it's a GOOD SIGN that you don't have much in common with other bloggers. I think most of the blogs these days are superficial and not genuine.

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  16. I didn't know this was a crisis!!! Should I? Cause this is where I am at. I don't care about any of that stuff either. Maybe I should….I still love you :)

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  17. I have definitely felt this way before. I actually ended up taking a few months off from blogging just so I could have some time to figure things out. I don't know if I can say that I really found what kind of "blogger" I am, but I now know more about myself and choose to write things that interest me instead of what I think people might want to read. I've been using my blog more recently to document my transition of becoming a minimalist and author and what it all means to me. I might not have a lot of followers or comments, but I enjoy the things that I write about and that makes me happy.

    I know what you mean about not being interested in 90% of what a lot of bloggers seem to be talking about. It's really nice to know that I'm not the only one. Oh and by the way, no pressure to comment back. Just wanted to let you know that you are not alone!

    Hope you have a fantastic day!

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  18. Thank you.Thank you. thank you! I feel just like you!
    I began blogging to post pics and vent about my little old life. Then I started wanting people to notice me so I would write about things that people liked. Don't get me wrong, I enjoyed getting to know others and learning new things through these posts, yet when blogging became a job, not just a hobby, I got tired. So now, I have finally returned from a 6month blog vacation and all I see is "follow" "promos" "grow your blog"...posts. And yes, its cool that people share this, but I just want to know about you. and my dear, I LIKE YOU AND YOUR BLOG!
    You do an awesome job at keeping it positive and funny! Me...I just never know if I make sense...heehee I will continue to find time and interesting tidbits to share in my neck of the woods.
    As for you...keep writing...I'll be there to read :)

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