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A wake-up call

If your friends with me on Instagram or Facebook, you may have seen me vent of how terrible my week was going. I totally hate when people do that, but I needed to write my frustration out immediately. My attitude quickly shifted as I looked through my pictures and realized how blessed I really am. I recently got back from Hawaii (photos to come, I promise!) and the week after I got back was insane. When I write it all out on paper, it really doesn't even sound all that bad. I had midterms, 3 tests in one day, work, volunteering, visiting teaching, chiropractor and doctor appointments, and a ton of other stuff. I guess you could say I was just awfully busy. I didn't have one second to breathe. Yes, yes, I know I said that I would never complain about being too busy on my anti-bucket list, but I meant about Trevor. As goes for me, I was so busy, and I didn't like it. 

On Wednesday night, we went to a meeting with our tax guy, and last year, it was pretty rewarding for us. We had a high return & that made it really good for us to save more money. However, this year, the total was 3 times what it was last year. Our tax guy said, "Ok,, well, it comes up to $13,564.00. That's how much you owe this year." I almost started laughing but then soon realized he was completely serious. He explained that the last company I worked for, Smart Rhino Labs, had taken advantage of their employees and are basically making their employees pay for their social security. It's twisted, it's messed up, and after asking him what we could do to get them in trouble, he only answered, "They'll only get caught once they get audited." I tend to believe I have had some close encounters with the devil himself.

 I got 100% on one of my tests, but failed the other two. You could say I was pretty darn depressed. I felt like a complete failure, especially after dedicating hours and hours to studying. I went and got myself a salted caramel hot chocolate from Starbucks. (Have you ever had one of those? You should probably go pamper yourself right now because you might die from the goodness.) It helped for a little bit, truly, but when I got home, I fell down on my knees and started bawling to my Heavenly Father. What did I do? I complained. I asked Him to somehow help me get through this. But at the end, I said, "Please give me a wake-up call. Please help me realize how good my life really is because right now, I'm struggling with all the bad stuff goin on."

The next day, we were on our way to Idaho. We picked up chick fil a for an early dinner because we were both hungry. As I was driving, I looked over at Trevor and his face was bright red. He was pointing to the side of the freeway. I said, "What is going on? Do you want me to pull over?" He nodded, while opening his door and trying to throw up. I thought he was sick. He ran out of the car, onto the side of the freeway, and started throwing up. I noticed him trying to get himself to throw up so then I realized that he was CHOKING. I started to freak out. I ran outside and asked him what he wanted me to do. I wish I had known the Heimlich maneuver,  but I didn't, so that just left me hitting him really hard on the back. After throwing up his own saliva for 15 minutes, he got back in the car. As I got back onto the freeway, I noticed that he was still struggling. At this point, I was completely panicked and said, "DO YOU NEED ME TO TAKE YOU TO THE ER?" He nodded. As he was struggling to breathe, I was holding onto his leg saying, "Stay calm. Don't talk. Please just stay calm. You can do this." I was shaking profusely. I was so scared. I cut off nearly ever car in my midst, and sped to the ER like nobody's business. I dropped him off and the doctors took him back into a room. 

The end of the story? He threw up, a lot, and ended up getting the chicken & lemonade out. Ew, I know. I have never been so scared in my entire life. Though there are countless other near-death experiences Mr. Schroeder could have experienced that could have been much more serious, I am thanking God and counting my blessings left and right. I don't know if this was what Heavenly Father was giving me as a "wake up call" but it sure feels like that. Having Trevor ALMOST pass out from not being able to breathe and seeing him in such a panicked state was one of the most terrible things I have ever experienced. I kept looking at him on the way back to Idaho, with such grateful eyes, sometimes a little teary. Yes, I may fail tests. I may have days where I can't even breathe until I lay my head down on the pillow. I may have times where I find myself wallowing in my own self-pity. Though the reality of it is that my Heavenly Father loves me. He listens to me. He gives me warnings and wake-up calls. Through my crazy week last week, I feel even more blessed. How could that be? I have never had such a week where I could go from self-pity and hatred toward everything going wrong, to the exact opposite of that. I am grateful. I am so grateful that I have the love of my life to cuddle with and to vent to. Not only that, the love of my life to have tickle fights with and talk about all of life's future occurrences. I am safe. I am breathing. I have my faith. I have my testimony. And I am happy. And that's all that matters. 

8 comments

  1. Oh goodness, that is definitely a stressful week. Sending a giant hug your way. And what a blessing that everything turned out okay for Trevor in the end!

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  2. Umm... your tax situation is terrible!!!! What is it with you guys and shady companies?!?! I'm so sorry!!!!! And oh my heck, I'm glad Trevor is ok, how scary!!!! I am sorry you had a really rough week, I hope this week is better and you get to do something fun and happy! You are amazing, and obviously there's some reason Satan is trying to get you down!

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  3. Goodness, it was just one of those weeks, wasn't it? I'm so sorry - especially about Trevor. I can't even begin to imagine how I would react in that situation. I need to learn the Hiemlich for grown ups and babies... so crazy about your taxes too! But your perspective is so lovely - glad to see you're looking at the silver lining. Xox

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  4. I find it strange that with so many good things in our lives when something bad happens, that can be the only thing we focus on. I am glad to hear your husband is okay, what a scary moment! And glad to hear that with that experience that was scary helped you realize how many wonderful blessings you do have and you were able to get a "wake up call". I sometimes need a big kick in the butt when I am all debby downer on myself because there are so many blessing in my life!

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  5. I love this. So glad he is okay!!! How scary!!

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  6. Oh man, that must have been terrifying! I had to take my husband to the ER this weekend too, but his was just an excruciating toothache. A shot of pain meds and he was fine. I was so upset about his $300 bill and had no idea how we would make ends meet this month, but then I walked past the checkout desk and heard someone talking about their $2300 bill. All it takes is a bit of perspective, huh? There is always something to be grateful for. I need to put that on a post it note on every wall in my house. Ha

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  7. Oh my gosh!! Poor Trevor! Poor YOU! God does work in mysterious ways doesnt he?

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  8. Glad that your husband is ok! That is really scary! Life is hard, and it gets you down, but one way or another everything always works out!

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