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I want all of us to make it

As most of you probably know, Utah is its own little bubble. When Trevor and I moved to Virginia Beach, I sort of enjoyed the atmosphere and the vibe that the area gave me. In Utah, I feel as if people are extremely competitive. I'm not quite sure why that is the case, but it has always bothered me. Living in Virginia Beach was a fresh breath of air just because nobody cared about how you lived your life. Nobody gave you crap for not being pregnant or the clothes you were wearing. Now, the majority of people here are LDS. In the Mormon culture, we are all taught to love one another, support one another, and become christlike. Obviously, in every religion, there are flawed individuals. Since social media has gotten so huge, the amount of competition, jealousy, and straight up meanness has increased drastically. And I don't like it. 

I have always talked about a few specific friends that have walked into my life. I can't help but refer to them because of how many life lessons I learned from them. In middle and high school, I had a particular friend who was always so competitive with me. If I had a date to prom, but she didn't, she would be really upset with me and not talk with me until she got a date. If I got a job that paid more than hers was, suddenly we were in a fight. It was a bit odd to tell you the truth. I'll always remember this talk my mama gave me. Yes, yes. I refer to her talks quite often as well (how could you not? They're so good!). She explained to me that it's not worth the tears and the sadness. If someone is being competitive, brush it off, and be happy for them when they succeed. You waste way too much time worrying about competition, when nothing matters in the grand scheme of things.


Ever since that talk she gave me, I have completely changed my aspect. You know when somebody gets engaged before you, or married before you, or starts a family before you, yet they are your same age or even younger? And you feel a tingle of jealousy? Well maybe in some situations? About a month ago, I went to see one of my best friends babies, and when I came back, my sister said, "Did you feel jealousy even for a couple second?" I immediately exclaimed, "No! I mean, I'm super happy for her, but it's not my time right now and it didn't leave me wanting a baby." 

This topic keeps coming to my mind because it really is a problem in this world we live in. I feel like comparison and competition go hand in hand, especially with social media. We've all done it. I wrote a post about it in January of 2013. Click here to read it. I wish all women were like that. Women get enough flack in today's society. Why can't we all just love each other and support each other? Why can't we focus on serving and uplifting those around us? 

2 comments

  1. amanda, you always have the best thoughts & i ESPECIALLY like this one. i am not a competitive person by nature, but i find myself getting that way if i have a friend that wants to make things a competition. one friend in particular seemed to put-down anything exciting that was happening to me, and the husband-competition. her husband always was getting better job offers, doing sweeter things for her, skipping out on nba games to watch the bachelor, taking more classes to prepare for the GMAT, oh it never ended. although it's taken a while and i still have to practice all the time, i have learned it's easier to be happy for people when you have learned to be happy with your life. other's successes don't take away from yours. anyway, thanks for sharing! you are wonderful.

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  2. I feel like this all the time; especially with blogging and social media. I don't feel like I am as good at something, or as cool as other girls. I tend to get jealous, especially with weddings. Our situation was a little different and I didn't get my dream wedding, so when I see other girls look gorgeous, and have the cutest weddings I get a little jealous and upset. I just have to remind myself that my wedding wasn't amazing, but my husband is and that's what really matters. Thanks so much for your post, I love hearing from you!! :)

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